Singer-songwriter Mariel Darling shared a video from her TikTok account to show how frightening dating has become, with people being “zombied.”
“Girl, are you being ghosted by someone? ” she shared with her 255,900 followers.
“It’s like ghosting, but he comes back from the dead after a couple of months and hits you up,” she explained in the video with 1.5 million views.
She continued by saying that dating in New York City is like a zombie apocalypse mingled with the Thriller video because all these boys are tap dancing around commitment.”
Several people agreed and shared their “zombie” experiences in the comments.
What do you think about the fact that they all zombie you simultaneously? “Why are four guys from my past all reaching out to me simultaneously?” one person said.
“Mine has a Jesus Christ complex, he comes back every 3 days,” one of them joked.
“It’s because the girl he thought was better than you realized he’s terrible and ghosted him!” someone suggested.
“I saw someone say she puts gravestone emojis on their name in contacts so she knows not to deal with them anymore,” a user wrote.
I would like to know why this has happened three times in the last three weeks. I read something that someone shared with me.
“Try to imagine what it would be like to be zombied by a guy named zombie. I didn’t know he was just living up to his potential,” another wrote.
“I think I’m being zombied. One day he ignores me, one day he looks at me as if I’m the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen and texts me till 3 am,” a user admitted.
I just experienced this. Only I went out with him twice, SIX years ago!” one person said.
According to dating expert Samantha Jayne, the zombie trend has been around for as long as relationships have.
“mixed with the ‘Thriller’ music video because all these boys are tap dancing around commitment.” Credit: TikTok/mariel_darling
“It can be extremely confusing and damaging. The loss of self-confidence and the anxiety associated with abandonment can severely impact self-esteem, and when that person reappears, it can give a sense of hope and a painful reminder of the sudden departure,”
A former flame returns out of the blue without explanation and expects things to be every day, which is cruel and leaves you bewildered. This person appears without accountability and expects things to return to normal, as they left off,” Jayne said.
In her opinion, there are two primary reasons why people become zombies – the first being that they are not good at communication and don’t know what to do when things don’t work out.
In the case of the poor communicators who ghosted the person because of their anxieties and insecurities, time eventually passes, and they try to reconnect with them.
Other reasons are more “malicious” and are used as strategies.
“They got back together with an ex, met someone new, and you’re their backup plan,” Jayne said. They suddenly feel lonely, have run out of options, and know you are sure to massage their egos until they find someone else.”
“They treat you like a doormat, so they reappear while disappearing again when they have a better opportunity,” she explained.
If a person is a poor communicator, anxious, and overthinking, they will likely come to you with an explanation and often apologise. In contrast, the malicious type will have the mindset of, ‘Hey, lucky you, I’ve reappeared.” “Have a great time!
However, Jayne pointed out that it is essential to remember that the person on the other end has much more power than the one on the other end.